The Ball State Shuffle

"What is the Ball State Shuffle", u ask? It's the one thing they don't tell you about in orientation. It's something that every student has had to do periodically during their attendance at BSU. It's when you find yourself shuffling from building to building to fix, what seems like, a simple problem. It's the perfect recipe for frustration.

Let me tell you a story....

Earlier this week, my homeboy and I were meeting up on campus at 7:30am, before my 1st class, to work out. Sounds like a good idea, right? WRONG!!!! The thing is, construction is being done on the building. So, the work out room had been moved. Do you think there was a sign to tell us where it had been moved to? Absolutely not. So after we walked the building for 15 minutes, we ran into an old professor of mine who looked liked she had just got done working out. So we asked her where the room was. She proceeded to say "down the stairs and to the right". Well, apparently, she meant "down the stairs and to the left".....yeah....took us another 10 minutes to figure that out.

We finally get into the workout room and give the attendant our ID's to swipe. Homeboy's went through just fine. Mine, on the other hand, got declined. So the attendant chic sent me to the office of the facility manager. I walked all the way over there to find, of course, the door is locked. She's NOWHERE to be found. So, I walked BACK to the attendant chic, who then, decided to page her. So, I'm sitting there, waiting to find out what the problem is. Ten minutes later, she finally decided to show up and said that since I've been away from BSU for over a year. I needed to have my old ID recoded upon re-enrollment so that it would work in the facility...



LoL...That was the EXACT look on my face, because I'm thinking....Why didn't anyone tell me that the day they got me re-enrolled?! I could have handled that WEEKS ago!!! She then told me that I could get it recoded in the building right across the street. So I get over to LaFollet and, of course, they have NO IDEA what I'm talking about and said that I needed to go over to the registrar's office...which is clear across campus...



So, I decide to call first, just to make sure I wouldn't be wasting a trip. The chic at the registrar's office answers the phone and the conversation goes a little something like this....
Me:I just got re-enrolled this semester. I'm having some problems using my ID in the workout facility and I was told that my ID needed to be recoded. Is this where I come to have that taken care of
Her: Recoded? Who told you that? I don't understand. It should work if you're re-enrolled. Are you registered for classes?
Me: It's not working. Yes, I'm registered for classes. The facility manager said it needs to be recoded.
Her: No, that's not right. It should be working.
Me: Well, it's NOT...
Her: It should be.
Me: Well...it's NOT. So what do I need to do?
Her: Bring it by the office so we can take a look at it.



She wasted 5 minutes of my life telling me it should be working while I'm telling her it's not....JUST to end up telling me to walk all the way over there anyway. I got over there and guess what she had to do...RECODE IT! UGH

Needless to say, I had to wait until AFTER class to workout. I didn't have time to move my car out of 2hr parking, so you know what was on my car when I finally got back to it after class....



AIN'T THAT ABOUT A..................

JESUS, TAKE THE WHEEL CUZ I'M GOING OFF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!
LoL...too done.

Jam Session

It's Friday....and I just feel like dancing. Allow me to be your deejay for a minute. Let's jump it off with a little throwback to 2007...a great year in my social life. HAHAHAHAHAHA. T-Pain, Buy You a Drink



Now WALK IT OUT!!!!.......



UH SNAP YA FINGAZ!!!



What you know about My Dougie?!!!



Ok...I think I'm ready to go on with my day now. But ummmm...I gotta mellow it out with that new Sade, Soldier of Love...



Happy Friday, yall!

Sleepless in Muncie...

Last night, I did something that I haven't done in a long time. I fell asleep on the phone while talking to my homegirl....and not like the times where you kind of nod off and then come right back. LoL. NO. I fell asleep...as in...I woke up a little while later with the phone still on my ear but the call ended. And not only did I sleep...I DREAMED! LOL I felt so bad. I called her back and apologized...you know she talked mad junk about me, but I was too tired to care.

I can't front, I've always been unable to fight my sleep. This is why I try not to do anything when I'm sleepy. I'd be the one to burn my house down trying to cook a late night snack....house would be up in flames and I'd be in my bed hugging the pillow. I've also been known to fall asleep while entertaining company at my place. LOL. I know it sounds bad, but when I'm tired...I'm tired. What happened last night, though, was something that hasn't happened to me since..... well, let's just say it's been a LONNNNNNNNG time.

Being back in school full time, in addition to working full time has completely exhausted me...not to mention the emotional exhaustion of the last week. I'm telling yall, I woke up this morning like...


DO YOU HEAR ME?! LOL

Something has got to give. I'm thinking that I probably have enough time in my schedule to get enough sleep and do everything that I need to do on a daily basis. I really need to work some time in to work out too. What I need to do is make a schedule...and stick to it. That's the mission for the day, come up with a schedule. I'll let yall know how that works out.

The Choice To Love

Remember the 1st time you chose to love?
Loving my 1st love, was one of the easiest decisions I've ever made. It was like breathing, I just did it. That was before I knew just how complicated love could really be. That was before my love ever had to be tested against anger, hurt, or frustration. It was long before the 1st tearful day or sleepless night...long before the 1st argument or break-up to make-up. That was when choosing love was easy. Ignorance can be such bliss.
It was only after feeling the hurt and pain that came along with the dissolution of that 5 year relationship that I began to even see love as a choice. I had made a choice...a choice to tolerate some things I once thought intolerable...a choice to forgive when everything in me said "RUN". It was also then that I decided to never make that choice again. And I haven't...until now, that is.
I've found that the choice NOT to love is a lonely one. So I'm choosing to love again.
Good choice or bad...Only time will tell...

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Sent from AT&T's Wireless network using Mobile Email

The Tears

Immediately...there were not a lot of tears. But today, I just can't seem to stop crying. I woke up....I cried. On my way to class....I cried. On my way to my car...I cried. Why won't the tears stop? They are making me miserable. This THING is 3 days old now....why is this happening now? Maybe it's the fact that I don't have to work today...so I actually have time to sit down and think about it...

And it hurts....

Like really.....hurts....

I keep wondering why didn't see the signs...or maybe I saw them but chose to ignore them. Yes, he confessed. Yes, he's sorry. Yes, it COULD be worse..........I have considered all of those things. But at the end of the day, the THING remains. It sits on my chest like a ton of bricks, and I'm just carrying it around with me. I tricked myself into believing that if I just stay busy enough, there wouldn't be enough time to think about it. That plan has totally backfired. I've gotten about 10 hours of sleep in the past three days. I keep trying to wear myself out so that by the time I get home and into bed, I'll fall asleep before the thoughts start bouncing off of each other. And I do....until I wake up 2 hours later and find myself staring at the ceiling.

I pray constantly....asking God for direction. Why is he not responding?...or maybe he is and I've been too busy to listen. That's probably what it is. hmph....stupid plan...

Meanwhile....

I'm over here LOVESICK.



My stomach hurts, chest hurts, back is aching.....the thought of the THING literally makes me cringe. And THEN there are the tears that refuse to stop falling. How do get past that? Lord knows I want to. Maybe I can't....or maybe I just won't. ugh...I HATE this.

I know one thing tho...If these tears don't stop, it's gonna be a long two days off.

Brokenhearted

"But I'm only broken hearted..."

How did I get here?

Yep...that's me.
Heartbroken.

It's like I was walking down the street on the most beautiful day you can imagine


(Don't judge my beautiful day....some people like summer...I happen to like fall.)

I'm walking along, somewhat reluntant to enjoy the weather because my gut (my mind) is telling me that it's going to rain, even though the weather girl (my heart) insists that it's going to remain clear. Hmph...what does SHE know? I mean...homegirl has definitely miscalled it a time or two in the past. *side eyes* But I digress...

So...everyone around me is telling me to just relax and enjoy the day. Whole time, I can't stop thinking about the fact that I don't have an umbrella, jacket, newspaper....NOTHING! I came out with no protection trying to trust the weather girl (heart). So if it starts to rain....I'm basically screwed. But it doesn't rain, at least, not immediately. BUT THEN...just as I start getting comfortable and enjoying my stroll through paradise...



Wouldn't you know it?!!! And remember, I wasn't smart enough to bring an umbrella or jacket like these fools in the pic. (not that any of that is helping their foolish behinds. LoL) So, ya girl is out here baddddddddd... like....



Hanging on for dear life!!!! Making that face with it and everything. LoL

I'm so confused. I don't know how I got here. I wasn't supposed to be in love....I hate what love does to me, but I wanted to trust my heart again. I made a choice...a conscious decision to trust my heart. But my heart is a liar. It always has been. How could I, so easily, forget that?...but more importantly...what do I do now? Now my heart wants to believe him when he says that I can trust him. But my mind is like..."R u crazy?!" The really messed up part is that I think I might be.......crazy in love. I'm on a trip, ya'll....destination unknown.....itenerary n/a. How did I get here? Do I stay and see what the end is going to be? or do I grab the remaining pieces of my heart and haul a** to the nearest exit? hhhhhhhhhhgh....stupid weather girl (heart).