tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-80597704721307930822024-03-05T16:49:53.442-08:00Essentially, MikkiMikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.comBlogger68125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-14748912328999275452011-12-23T14:26:00.001-08:002011-12-23T14:26:26.062-08:00TwelveTwentyThreeElevenI haven't really blogged in a while. There are several different reasons for that....reasons I won't get into right now. But I'm kind of in a reflective mood today, so I decided to put my thoughts in ink... <br />
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It's funny how life comes full circle. And the past year has been a tornado for me. I've had people come into my life, seemingly, out of nowhere. That's strange for me, because I normally keep people at a distance until I figure them out. That's the way I've always been. But for some reason, this year, I allowed a few new people to enter my heart without doing my due diligence to figure out their intentions. I wish I could say it's been all good and I'm glad I did it. That's not honest though....and my goal with this post is to be transparent. So, I'll be honest and say that I wish I had not allowed, at least, one of those people into my life at all....much less my heart. See... one of my biggest flaws is that I assume people say exactly what they mean and are exactly who they present themselves to be. I gotta stop doing that. If I've learned nothing else from this year, I've learned this: Most people will say anything to get you to do what they want you to do. And, people present themselves to be the people they desire to be...not, necessarily, the people they actually are. I know that sounds cynical and I hate to come off that way because it's really not a good color on me. But, that's real. You can't really give people credit for anything about their character. You have to make them earn it. And it doesn't really matter how you came to be acquainted with them. Remember, even the devil himself can quote the Word of God. That's all I'm going to say about that. <br />
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On friendship.... <br />
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Life happens. People change. They just do. It happens for many different reasons. But, because people change, friendships evolve. The important thing to remember is that evolution does not necessarily mean dissolution. All good things come to an end. They either evolve into a new good thing or they end altogether. I've had some friendships evolve into new good things.... and I've had other friendships come to a screeching halt. I used to feel bitter about that. But I've learned that for everything, there is an appropriate season. Now, I accept the fact that...for whatever reason.... the friendship I had with these people is not appropriate for this season of our lives. I understand that doesn't mean we won't ever be friends again. And it's because of that understanding that I am able to let go graciously with the trust that God will reunite us in a season that will allow our friendship to flourish. And if that season never comes, that's ok too. I wish them well. That's all I'm saying about that. <br />
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On spirituality.... <br />
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I love the Lord. He heard my cry. LoL. But seriously, he did. I've prayed over a lot of different things this year and while not all the things I've prayed for have come to pass yet, I know that God has heard every prayer. I understand that delay is not denial. But, more importantly, I understand that denial is not always punishment. There are some things that are just not meant to be. At this point in my life, I have complete trust in the will of God. I will not go unless he gives direction. I will not speak unless he gives me the words to say. No compromising. His will is where I need to be. There's nothing else to be said on that. <br />
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On health.... <br />
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People that know me know I've had some struggles with my health this year. At one point, I was told I have MS. I have now, officially, been diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Wow. I can't believe I'm sharing this like..this. It's something that I haven't even really shared with a lot of my family. It's not because I don't want anybody to know. It's because it's not that important. I know what you're thinking: "How could it not be important?" Well, it's not that important, because I'm in denial. (I told yall I was being transparent). The other reason I haven't shared it is because I don't want anybody to feel sorry for me or think of me as 'sick', because I don't think of myself that way. However, I do realize that this is something I need to let people in on so that they will understand why I'm always tired, why sometimes I really don't have the energy to do some of the things they ask me to do, and that the 'serious' look on my face is often just a reflection of the general fatigue I'm often feeling. I've declined to be put on 'uppers'. At this point, I don't believe I need them. That's not to say I never will. But right now, I don't. Here's the thing: I believe God. Not, necessarily, that he will take this thing away. But that he won't allow this to be debilitating for me. And that's all I need to say about that. <br />
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On romance... <br />
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You have to do what makes you happy. And you have to be ok with the fact that sometimes your friends won't 'get it'. But it's not for them to 'get'. Here's the thing: Stop telling people your business before you even figure it out yourself. I'm not going to tell you not to tell your friends everything. Tell them as much (or as little) as you want. If they're your friends, they won't judge you. But don't tell your friends your business before you figure it out yourself. Do with that whatever you want. That's all I'm saying about it. <br />
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Welp...my heart is clear. Have a Merry Christmas. And a Happy New Year. Hey...that rhymed! Good for me! <br />
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Be blessed :)Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-74926467036459768242011-07-07T04:46:00.000-07:002011-07-07T05:12:58.130-07:00Don't Worry About Judas (M2W Devotional)One of the worst feelings in the world is finding out that a person you consider a friend is behaving as though you're enemies. And even worse than that is having that person still come around you, laugh with you, and talk with you as though they haven't behaved that way....or as though you don't know that they have behaved that way. What I'm talking about here is pure, outright, blatant betrayal...a Judas-type betrayal. You completely opened your heart to them and they sold you out to the first person that was willing to buy. This is what Jesus went through with Judas. But Jesus handled his situation a lot different than we, typically, handle ours.<br />
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See, when we find out that a friend has betrayed us, one of the first things we do is cease to identify them as a friend. We make it known, usually, in a very pronounced way that this person is no longer considered a friend. But that's not what Jesus did at all. Think back to when Jesus was in Gethsemane with the Peter, John, and James just before the guards took him away. He knew that Judas was coming to betray him. He even said to Peter, John, and James, "Rise, let us be going. See, My betrayer is at hand”(Matthew 26:46) just before Judas appeared with guards he led to Jesus. And yet, Jesus still addressed him as 'friend'.<br />
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"Now His betrayer had given them a sign, saying, “Whomever I kiss, He is the One; seize Him.” Immediately he went up to Jesus and said, “Greetings, Rabbi!” and kissed Him. But Jesus said to him, “Friend, why have you come?” Then they came and laid hands on Jesus and took Him." (Matthew 26:50)<br />
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How could Jesus call him 'friend'? A friend would have never betrayed him that way, right? Why didn't Jesus lay into him...flip out...tell him about himself...or SOMEthing? Well, there are a couple of things that Jesus understood from the very beginning.<br />
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1. Jesus understood the nature of Judas' character from the very beginning.<br />
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"Jesus answered them, “Did I not choose you, the twelve, and one of you is a devil?” He spoke of Judas Iscariot, the son of Simon, for it was he who would betray Him, being one of the twelve." (John 6:70)<br />
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Jesus was very much aware of the character flaws of the company he kept. He wasn't, at all, caught off guard. How much drama could we save ourselves if we just paid attention to the character traits of the company we keep BEFORE they do something hurtful to US? I know there are times when God allows things to happen, seemingly to us, out of the blue. But, generally speaking, we could discern the character of the people we surround ourselves with if we just took the time to ask God and then, pay attention. We don't do that though. We don't seek God about the company we keep and then, when we are betrayed, we immediately fall into the victim role. 'How could they do this to me? What did I do to them? God, why did you allow this to happen?' When the real question is...Why did YOU allow it to happen YOURSELF? Because had you prayed for discernment, you would have gotten it. Had you asked God if it was his will for this person to be in your life from the very beginning, you would have gotten an answer.<br />
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But back to Jesus and Judas...<br />
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So, Jesus already knew that Judas would betray him from the start. Why, then, did he even allow Judas in his circle to begin with?<br />
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2. Jesus understood divine purpose. He told us in John that no one takes his life, but he gives it freely:<br />
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"Therefore My Father loves Me, because I lay down My life that I may take it again. No one takes it from Me, but I lay it down of Myself. I have power to lay it down, and I have power to take it again. This command I have received from My Father.” (John 10:17-18)<br />
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Jesus understood that Judas' betrayal of him would, in the grand scheme of things, not be the cause of his crucifixion. The death and resurrection of Jesus Christ was divine purpose. It would have happened with or without Judas. He was just playing a role. And his role, in this situation, happened to be that of a betrayer. Keep in mind though, that Jesus already knew this. Did he treat him any differently than the other disciples? No. Did he go and tell everybody that Judas was a devil? No. Sometimes God reveals things to us ab people, not so that we can separate ourselves Or expose them, but so that we won't be caught off guard when things happen. Some betrayers are in your life for a reason. They're a part of the divine purpose for your life. Know that they won't affect your outcome negatively. They're just playing they're role. And as hard as it is to know that they are your betrayer and not call them out, know that it would be a mistake to give that situation too much attention. <br />
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Don't worry about Judas. Judas is going to be Judas. Judas had already betrayed Jesus BEFORE the last supper. He had already agreed to give Jesus up. He was just waiting for the right time (Matthew 26: 14-16). And yet, when Jesus told the disciples, at the last supper that one of them would betray him, Judas had the nerve to ask if it would be him (Matthew 21-25). But notice that Jesus still didn't really call him out. He knew what was happening but he didn't give it too much attention. That's what some of us need to learn to do...not give negative situations so much attention. Stay focused on your purpose. Everything is not meant to be exposed. Some people will expose themselves if you just let it play out. So, don't worry about Judas. Judas is doing exactly what Judas is supposed to do. You just keep doing what you're supposed to do and keep praying for discernment so you'll know who's playing what role.<br />
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Be blessed =)Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-72546354696939216942011-06-13T14:18:00.001-07:002011-06-13T14:18:20.866-07:00Glory in Tribulation (M2W Devotional)<link href="file:///C:%5CDOCUME%7E1%5Cmkthomas%5CLOCALS%7E1%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml" rel="File-List"></link><link href="file:///C:%5CDOCUME%7E1%5Cmkthomas%5CLOCALS%7E1%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_themedata.thmx" rel="themeData"></link><link href="file:///C:%5CDOCUME%7E1%5Cmkthomas%5CLOCALS%7E1%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_colorschememapping.xml" rel="colorSchemeMapping"></link><style>
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<div class="MsoNormal">Life can be harsh, sometimes. There are unexpected twists, turns, and fastballs….fastballs that can come so hard that they knock you down. And getting knocked down is not so bad when you can, quickly, figure out how to get back up, but getting back up can, sometimes, be a lot easier said than done. It’s easy to get discouraged in those times. It’s human to get discouraged in those times. Being a believer doesn’t mean that you never get discouraged. Being a believer means that you don’t stay discouraged, because you know that God is always working in your favor. “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” ~Jeremiah 29:11 <o:p></o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Even knowing that, there are times when we become resentful of our trials and tribulations. We wonder why God allows us to go through the things we go through. We wonder what we’ve done to deserve such hard trials. We, sometimes, even wonder if God is still listening to our prayers. We find it difficult to enjoy life at these times. I mean… who can rejoice when the entire bottom has fallen out of their life? But, Paul challenges us, in Romans, to do just that. <o:p></o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">“Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2 through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.” ~Romans 5:1-5<o:p></o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Paul tells us here that we should glory in our sufferings. What does the word “glory” mean in this context? It’s used as a verb here, which is not the way we normally see it used. The word glory, as a verb, means “to <span id="hotword" name="hotword" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'" style="cursor: default;">exult</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'" style="cursor: default;">with</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'" style="cursor: default;">triumph;</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'" style="cursor: default;">rejoice</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'" style="cursor: default;">proudly</span>”. Another definition is “to boast”. So…wait. I’m supposed to not only, stay encouraged in my tribulation, but I’m supposed to rejoice proudly…even to the point of boasting?! What is there to boast about?! Have you seen my life, lately?! No. But I’ve had a look at Paul’s and if he can say this while he was, literally, being persecuted for the Gospel, we can too. Paul and James, both, give us reasons why we should rejoice. Paul said we should rejoice because we know that suffering produces perseverance. Perseverance produces character. And character produces hope and hope will never put us to shame. I like how the NKJ version says that “hope does not disappoint”.<o:p></o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">James gave us another reason why we should rejoice in tribulation. He said, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” ~James 1:2-4 So…wait. My trials and tribulations are helping to mature me? No. It’s the perseverance that you gain through your trials that help to make you mature and complete. Your trials are just a means to an end. And the end is a better you! So, rejoice! I know it’s not easy. I know you’re at the end of your rope. I know it seems like it’s never going to end. But it will! God is working something in you. He has not forgotten about you. You will come out of this…whatever it is…a better you if you figure out a way to glory while you’re in it. So, rejoice today! A better you is on the way!<o:p></o:p></div>Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-65759844311615621092011-04-12T12:46:00.000-07:002011-04-12T12:46:36.623-07:00You by Amena BrownThis is EVERYthing. This just took me all the way in. <br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/rmWAoiAJ3nY" title="YouTube video player" width="480"></iframe>Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-86743799931420707482011-04-12T12:41:00.000-07:002011-04-12T12:41:38.586-07:00Change is good.What's up, yall? I know it's been a while since I've blogged here regularly. I've been doing a lot of soul searching concerning my desire to have a career as a writer. In doing so, I've realized that some things need to change. This blog is one of those things. EM started off as a personal blog....it was intended to be a place for me to write about how the personal things in my life are affected by my walk with Christ. More and more, tho, I found it evolving into more of a platform for me to share thoughts, ideas, and messages given to me through my own devotion and personal time with the Lord. I'm not mad at this evolution at all. I do, however, feel the need now to allow this space to be that and only that. It's not a secret that I like music other than gospel and I like things that are not necessarily spiritually related. What I'm saying to you is that, from now on, you won't find those things here. It's not that I think these are bad things or I feel bad for liking them, it just comes down to me, as a writer, realizing that I have more than one audience and I won't be able to satisfy them all in one place.<br />
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So, to my people that love to read my devotions and spiritual/religious topics, this is now where you'll be able to find that without interruption. YAY!!!!!<br />
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And, to my people that love to read my randomness, you can catch that at http://essentiallymik.tumblr.com. YAY!!!<br />
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And, to my people that love to read it all, YOU ARE AWESOME!!!....check me out at both places.<br />
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I want to thank all of you that take the time to read what I write. It means a lot to me. In the next weeks, you'll see this blog begin to look a little different. It'll be more contoured to the needs of its audience. Know that this expansion just means that I'm growing as a writer and that my brand is becoming more diverse. Change is good!Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-43258338062381037002011-04-02T14:43:00.000-07:002011-04-02T14:53:23.864-07:00.....Do It Unto The Lord (Devotional for M2W)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-BvIY5awmL5xHmqQkRtVKn5UUoHGH3m5nLXaWfr1Xos1i_Mt2zklUk2LKoaLDteAtEWdifc0KWAw1yOgEu6ttA-EUI3rfCRKapXJqyP4wGcsLYUhcjR1quC1GHt4sp6liVD9aT4iJfhuz/s1600/FE_PR_090603fitexcuses_busy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" r6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-BvIY5awmL5xHmqQkRtVKn5UUoHGH3m5nLXaWfr1Xos1i_Mt2zklUk2LKoaLDteAtEWdifc0KWAw1yOgEu6ttA-EUI3rfCRKapXJqyP4wGcsLYUhcjR1quC1GHt4sp6liVD9aT4iJfhuz/s1600/FE_PR_090603fitexcuses_busy.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div>Our lives are filled with commitments. Many of us are in school and/or work full time. We are involved in ministry at our churches. Some of us have children and families to hold together. Several of us are in relationships. On top of that, many of us are involved in organizations, causes, and community service. Amazingly, there are some people that do all of these things. My point is, we all live very active lives. Generally speaking, this is a good thing. But after so long of juggling all these things, sometimes we get into a routine. And along with routine, a lot of times, comes a lack of attention or a slack in the effort we put in. In other words... after so long of doing these things, we begin to place our focus on getting it all done instead of on making sure that we are doing it all well. <br />
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Lately I have been in prayer and seeking God, specifically, about his purpose and will for my life in terms of my day to day routines. And one thing he has been dealing with me about is my tendency to over commit myself. Like many of us, I have a hard time saying 'no' to the people and things I love. So when people ask me if I'm available to do things, I immediately start trying to find the time to do it.....even when I know I'm stretching myself too thin. I, normally, end up regretting committing myself to so many things, but I remember what God said in <strong>Deuteronomy 23:23... "Whatever your lips utter you must be sure to do, because you made your vow freely to the LORD your God with your own mouth.</strong>" The next thing I know, I'm running around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to complete a task I shouldn't have committed myself to in the first place because I knew I didn't really have the time. Have you ever found yourself here? Then you know what I'm talking about. It makes you a very likable person to do everything you're asked to do. But is God pleased?<br />
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I know that, at this point, you're like... 'what does this have to do with God'? I thought the same thing. The answer is very simply... EVERYTHING. The bible says... <strong>"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving." ~Colossians 3:23-24</strong>. Now... I realize that I've taken this out of context just a little. But it's not a huge stretch. The gist of Paul's message to the Colossians in this passage was to make sure that the new life they had in Christ was evident in everything they did, be it work, family...everything. How do we make our lives in Christ evident in what we do? We do that, not only, by being diligent and faithful to completing what we said we were going to do but, also, by putting an honest effort into completing the task well. Everything God does, he does well. He does not get lackadaisical in his covenants to us. We should, therefore, not expect that he would be pleased when we treat our commitments to him that way.<br />
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The part of that scripture that really stands out to me is the part where Paul says that it is the Lord Christ that we serve. No matter what we do or what earthly person or reason we do it, we need to always keep in mind that it is Christ we serve. He is watching. Therefore, when we commit ourselves to something, it's not just important THAT we do it. But it's important HOW we do it. Think about your own life and all the things to which you have ongoing commitments....your church, your family, your career, your fraternity/sorority, M2W, ect. Ask yourself if you have delegated your time in such a way that you can fulfill your obligations to these things in a way that is pleasing to God. After all, it is him that you are serving. Is he pleased with the way you handle your commitments? When you say 'yes', do you fulfill that commitment? Or do you find yourself spread too thin and end up having to back out or not perform the task effectively?<br />
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It should be our goal that God is pleased with everything we do or don't do. Always remember that when you give your word to someone, you are also giving that word unto the Lord. And he will hold us accountable to it. Here's a challenge. It's something I've challenged myself to do, and now I'm going to challenge you. Every time to you have to back out of something you said you were going to do... or every time you end up not doing something as well as you could have because you didn't allocate enough time, don't just apologize to the person. Apologize to the Lord as well. When I started forcing myself to do this, I started being careful about committing myself to things. I started being more diligent about maintaining my personal calendar so I wouldn't over commit myself. In taking this challenge, I think you'll find yourself a better manager of your time, because the last thing you'll want to have to do is repent for something so avoidable.<br />
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Be blessed =)Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-3349912383913636592011-03-19T10:51:00.000-07:002011-03-19T10:52:25.810-07:00Destination: Destiny (M2W Devotional)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhR4f6GuLRGVkZD_MDDbZf6PLdL9MjZQP270TwAOtVcqe3m_tRYdxX-UlelX0b3COVl8vQq5x0nxPMnfa9jkbjdPncoVNgAjS-GX9B_84IK-Efa8ib0By9yQWFxoeAqLXXnfWDB-n5JjyGh/s1600/fate-and-destiny.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="184" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhR4f6GuLRGVkZD_MDDbZf6PLdL9MjZQP270TwAOtVcqe3m_tRYdxX-UlelX0b3COVl8vQq5x0nxPMnfa9jkbjdPncoVNgAjS-GX9B_84IK-Efa8ib0By9yQWFxoeAqLXXnfWDB-n5JjyGh/s320/fate-and-destiny.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
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Let's talk a little bit about destiny.<br />
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What is 'destiny'? It's defined as "<span id="hotword" name="hotword" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'" style="background-color: transparent; cursor: default;">the</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'">predetermined,</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'" style="background-color: transparent; cursor: default;">usually</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'" style="background-color: transparent; cursor: default;">inevitable</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'">or</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'">irresistible,</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'">course</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'">of</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'" style="background-color: transparent; cursor: default;">events". The most important word being "predetermined". As believers, we know that the predeterminer of our destiny is God... the Alpha and Omega ...the author AND finisher of our faith. Remember that he told Jeremiah, '</span>“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.” (Jeremiah 1:5). God's plan for your life was already designed before you were even born. Think of your destiny as a destination. <br />
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We see the destination but how do we get there? We must, daily, submit to the will of God. A lot of us are in the stages of our lives where we are really starting to seek God concerning his purpose and will for our us. As we start thinking of future plans for our education, our careers, our families...it is essential to make sure that our own wills are yielding to the will of God. Notice I used the word 'yield' and not 'merge'.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXe6Q13cjk5c5BnYJ-nmSsNnPdXny_9sYbPL5P0RK1EoYbbL543MEP1vHQ6l7cgUizIDbOjZVamxzG08tTFU4JL13ktyclOObZsxo4BQcfk_GYMI8fBzecYAGKHSBFjn78QSP23DgP9JXO/s1600/yield.GIF" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXe6Q13cjk5c5BnYJ-nmSsNnPdXny_9sYbPL5P0RK1EoYbbL543MEP1vHQ6l7cgUizIDbOjZVamxzG08tTFU4JL13ktyclOObZsxo4BQcfk_GYMI8fBzecYAGKHSBFjn78QSP23DgP9JXO/s1600/yield.GIF" /></a></div><br />
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All too often we try to blend what we want with God's plan and what we end up with is a major crash because <b>the will of God does not merge.</b> It will not move over and allow your plans to come in. Your will needs to completely yield to God's will. Stop asking God to share the road and just get in his car. By getting in God's car, I just mean making a choice to do things God's way, as opposed to doing it your own way. We've already established that God knows the road to the destination a lot better than you do. Once you make the choice to get in his car, you can think of his will as the GPS.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgE3N69rk8mhfB_GzySD5N8iM86bsQr2qnZN1DjJ4LKv2X-c5AFAbNR8JGpW09nsrjTJwS7zXhIJjCS4Ppb956d2HAs66DUMcYO1IFmuUwLQPrplYA7bwvk-64a1PD6B6r1E80r144E2DiC/s1600/nuvi760rf-thumb.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="263" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgE3N69rk8mhfB_GzySD5N8iM86bsQr2qnZN1DjJ4LKv2X-c5AFAbNR8JGpW09nsrjTJwS7zXhIJjCS4Ppb956d2HAs66DUMcYO1IFmuUwLQPrplYA7bwvk-64a1PD6B6r1E80r144E2DiC/s320/nuvi760rf-thumb.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
It will tell you which moves to make and when, if you consistently seek him through prayer... "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him” (<a href="http://www.christiananswers.net/bible/james1.html#5">James 1:5</a>). ... and the word of God.... "Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path” (<a href="http://www.christiananswers.net/bible/psa119.html#105">Psalm 119:105</a>). Remember that God sent the Holy Spirit to guide us. "<span class="woj"><sup class="versenum" id="en-NIV-26740">1</sup>But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all the truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come.</span> <span class="woj"><sup class="versenum" id="en-NIV-26741">14</sup> He will glorify me because it is from me that he will receive what he will make known to you." (John 16:13-14) </span><br />
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<span class="woj">We all know that the only time a GPS system really works is when we actually use it. That's where your faith comes in. It's easy to do what God says do and go where God says go when the conditions of your life are pleasing to you or when things appear to be moving in your favor. But what about when it doesn't look so good? What about when the road is so cloudy that you can't even see in front of you? Can you trust God to maneuver as we wills even then? God said go to grad school. But, your GPA isn't good enough to get in. Do you trust God enough to apply anyway? God said the job is yours. But the requirements for the position prefer a lot more experience than you have. Do you believe God and submit your resume anyway? God called you to ministry. But everybody knows your past is questionable. Do you worry about what people will say? or do you trust God and do what HE said? <b>It's time to get serious about exercising and growing our faith. </b>The Bible says in </span><span class="redheading"> 2 Corinthians 1:20 that God's promises are "Yes" and "Amen"... meaning they are guaranteed. We must always walk by faith and not by sight.(2 Corinthians 5:7). That might mean that sometimes you have to move in a way that raises some people's eyebrows. It might mean that you have to go even when everybody else is staying. It might mean that you have to walk alone sometimes. But that's ok. Just remember that there's a destination in mind and everybody won't go with you. Philippians 1:6 says "</span>being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." <b>Know that if God said it, he WILL perform it</b>! Remember that every time you do something other than what God says do, he is forced to reroute you to your destination. That doesn't mean you won't ever get there. His grace is sufficient (2 Corinthians 12:9). But it takes longer that way. You have to go through more when you are disobedient.<br />
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As you travel the road to your destiny, know that God has amazing plans for your life! The conditions might not look good right now, but keep in mind that this is the journey, not the destination. And be encouraged! You WILL get there!<br />
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Be blessed. <br />
<div class="dndata"><span id="hotword"> </span></div>Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-27523964745461957252011-02-25T07:29:00.000-08:002011-02-25T07:29:10.276-08:00No More Drama (Devotional for M2W)'Make sure that no one repays wrong for wrong. But always strive to do what is right for each other and everyone else.' 1 Thessalonians 5:15 <br />
The book of 1 Thessalonians is the first letter that Paul wrote to the people of Thessalonica. In this particular chapter, (I encourage you to read it in it's entirety at your convenience.) Paul talks about what seperates us, people of the light, from non-<span style="background-color: yellow;">believers</span>, people of darkness. He, basically, gives us a rundown of how we should behave.....how we should treat our leaders and how we should treat each other. One of the things he talks about is being patient with each other. He challenges us to be long suffering with each other and to do it in love.<br />
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The verse that I would like to pay special attention to, in this devotional, is the 15th verse. It's in this verse that Paul presents the greatest challenge for most of us, as believers. He tells us to not repay wrong for wrong and to do what is right for/to everyone. Have you ever noticed how it seems like the people that do the most wrong to you, are the same ones that need your help down the line. They talked about you, lied on you and to you, disclosed things about you that were said to them in confidence, stole from you, turned others against you, ect. And now....they need you. And guess what.... God requires that you not hold the wrong that was done to you against them and lend your hand to help them. <br />
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I can't tell you how many times I've been presented with this challenge. I can't tell you how many times I've asked God why he would allow them to call on me for help knowing the wrong they've done to me. And God's answer is always the same.....'This is how you will show them who I am.' Anybody can quote scripture and use scripture to tell someone else how wrong they are. But God wants us to be doers and not just hearers of the word. It is our actions that change hearts and lead people to Christ. The Bible says, 'Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works and glorify your father in heaven.'~Matthew 5:16<br />
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A lot of us say that we want to be drama free. We declare almost every week that we are done with the drama of our lives. And yet....every other week we find ourselves right back in a personal soap opera. I challenge you to think about how much of the drama in your life could be avoided if you just made up in your mind that you are done repaying wrong for wrong....that you are done hurting people as a reaction to them hurting you. Think about this: The drama in your life does damage to your witness. Ain't nobody interested in hearing about the God you serve when your life looks like never ending episode of All My Children for all to see. When we engage in the exchanging of wrong for wrong, hurt for hurt, evil for evil....that is exactly what our lives look like, a dramatic mess.<br />
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You can't control what people do to you or how people treat you. But you can control how you respond and how you treat them. In fact, God requires that you do control how you treat them. He requires that we don't repay them wrong for the wrong they've done to us. We are the light of the world. He requires that we let our light shine so that he may get the glory.<br />
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Be blessed =)Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-25994511926406514582011-02-09T09:38:00.000-08:002011-02-09T09:38:41.719-08:00The Choice to Die...Daily (Devotional for M2W)One of the many phrases I, often, hear tossed around among Christians is the idea of 'dying to the flesh'. For years and years I've heard it tossed around, but it wasn't until recently...when God started dealing with me on a personal level about 'dying to my flesh' that I really began thinking about what it really means and how my neglect of it has impacted my ability to function in ministry the way God intends.<br />
At the very beginning of our Christian walks, when we first accepted Christ as our Savior, most of us were baptised. That baptism was symbolic of the choice we made to deny ourselves or die in the flesh and be reborn in the spirit. One thing that we must realize, though, is that this 'fleshly death' is not a one time thing. Rather, it is our responsibility, as servants of God, to crucify our flesh on a daily basis. Why is this necessary day after day? Paul said it best... 'For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the spirit, and the spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other so that you do not do what you want.' ~Galatians 5:17. Let me just make it plain... Your flesh and the spirit of God are not on the same page, never was on the same page, and never will be. Since our flesh does not agree with the spirit, it is our flesh that must be sacrificed so that we may operate in the spirit. This is especially important when it comes to operating in ministry. We don't move in steps that are ordered by God when our flesh is governing our actions.<br />
The Bible says in John 3:30 that 'He must increase, but I must decrease.' Less of me, more of him....we should be living our lives, daily, with that in mind. It's not easy. It means that you won't be able to go all the places you used to go, hang with all the people you used to hang with, participate in all the activities you used to participate in, or even listen to all the music you used to listen to. Needless to say, it's a complete lifestyle change. I'll be the first to admit that I mess it up more than I get it right. But I thank God that with every new day comes brand new mercies. <br />
If it is our goal to function in ministry according to the will of God, we need to, daily, go through the process of purging ourselves of pride, self-will, and all the other things that cause us think of ourselves first and God somewhere after that. Our wills must yield to his will. When we hold ourselves accountable to doing this everyday, humility develops and our faith is strengthened. We are, then, able to be used by God the way he has purposed. Make the choice to die to your flesh today and everyday.<br />
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Be blessed =)Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-55311422290349363172011-01-16T14:09:00.000-08:002011-01-16T14:09:39.839-08:00Is There A Such Thing As Being Too Real?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcqEK9bdVdzjk5dEAA-R__lPvSOycOnbT-HfzrKNmTMF1OtMM2siRT_b1sI5KlP7MsX6T0BzJVcZBGVo-Rd5Cvqk6c0mN5NfwThypP4n81DihtbjplPWRlF-o9ZBmsyK0l4YTydXbZ8w1U/s1600/ist2_2813071-the-outcast.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcqEK9bdVdzjk5dEAA-R__lPvSOycOnbT-HfzrKNmTMF1OtMM2siRT_b1sI5KlP7MsX6T0BzJVcZBGVo-Rd5Cvqk6c0mN5NfwThypP4n81DihtbjplPWRlF-o9ZBmsyK0l4YTydXbZ8w1U/s320/ist2_2813071-the-outcast.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
'I'm in my own world. I speak how I feel. Sometimes I feel like, I'm just too real.'<br />
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Lil Kim said that a few years back. Well, with a couple of explicits added in. That quote, though, has always stuck with me. Anybody that knows me, knows that once I decide how I feel about a something, I have no problem whatsoever speaking on it. I've always been that way. In school, my teachers often described me as 'opinionated' and having 'strong convictions'. It was never a surprise to my mom, though. I got it honestly. My grandmother was the type of person that always shot straight from the hip. She told you how she felt and she let you deal with your own emotions about it. She never forced it on you. She wasn't aggressive with it. But if you asked her for her opinion or talked to her about your situation....she gave it to you raw. I'm the same way. I always just assumed that this characteristic didn't bother the people around me. In fact, up until recently, I never even thought about it at all. People would tell my that I'm extremely blunt, but I didn't know what they meant. And to be real, I really didn't care. I was just being the only me I know how to be.<br />
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My tongue has always been sharp. I know this about me. If I'm not careful, I'll rip a person to shreds not even thinking about it. This is why, even when I'm provoked, I try really hard to walk away from verbal altercations. Words can be damaging... in an irreversible kind of way for some people. A person with an extended vocabulary such as myself *clears throat* can do a lot of damage in just a few short sentences. So, I censor. I know that's hard for some of yall to believe. But, YES, I DO censor. What comes up does NOT, in fact, come out as some of you have alleged. LoL. One thing I don't do is: fake. I love being Mikki....the REAL Mikki. I find the unadulterated me quite refreshing. *takes sigh of relief* And as long as I'm coming from a good place, I don't see anything wrong with being real.<br />
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I've found though, lately, that everybody does not appreciate the kind of real people like me bring to the table. I'm sure some of yall can relate to this. Ever say something with the most genuine of intentions and have the person respond negatively? Ever say something SO real, that it cost you a relationship, friendship, a job, ect? Ever have someone completely shut down on you after you told them how you REALLY feel? Then you know what I'm talking about. I never thought about being 'real' as only an option until recently. I don't think anybody that's, genuinely, real ever does.....until it costs them something. I was faced with such a situation, recently. I was real. And it cost me. A lot. For the first time, I had to ask myself if speaking on what I really feel is worth the potential for loss that it comes with. See, that's what a lot of people don't think about. You can be as real as you want to be. But you have to be willing to take some personal losses because of it. That's the trade off. You get to be real, but they get to disassociate themselves from you if they don't like it....and YOU have to be ok with that. I'm always sceptical about people who claim to be real 100% of the time and also claim to have many friends. It sounds good in theory, but it just doesn't work that way in practice. The truth in inconvenient for a lot of people and 'real' is not nearly as popular as people claim it is. And THAT'S real.<br />
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So what do yall think? Is there a such thing as being too real? Have you been in a situation where being 'real' cost you something you didn't want to lose? Tell me about it...Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-55580110840283495972011-01-14T09:17:00.000-08:002011-01-14T09:17:15.139-08:00IT'S ALIIIIIIIIVE!!!!!: The Monster of my Heart<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhP8HwOIKak0RBMc84X4xS_rRoXmMG5Wumk_ItGEIqFg4lTDhhUoly29O0e3jjLpoU_frjFS0iEK5kWLlMsDPucu1LvN_brmf8ZrLyIFlexrbvGVuO5ot02mfQ_XICK16b9ao17s5xAyaH0/s1600/394.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="249" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhP8HwOIKak0RBMc84X4xS_rRoXmMG5Wumk_ItGEIqFg4lTDhhUoly29O0e3jjLpoU_frjFS0iEK5kWLlMsDPucu1LvN_brmf8ZrLyIFlexrbvGVuO5ot02mfQ_XICK16b9ao17s5xAyaH0/s320/394.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
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Now I know how Frankenstein must have felt.<br />
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I know what you're thinking... 'You're gone for 2 months and the 1st thing you say when you come back is THAT?' LoL. Just stay with me. It'll all come together at the end.<br />
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I know how Frankenstein must have felt. I, too, created a monster. I wasn't trying to, but I did. I'm not gonna bore yall with the details. Let me just say this:<br />
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1. Be careful about allowing someone to think they can enter and exit your life at will. Your life does not have revolving doors at the entrance. I'm not saying that you shouldn't give second chances. Hey...give as many chances as you want, but know that, at some point, you have to say "Either you're going to be here or you're not." You have to do that for you. Otherwise, you'll be stuck with a person that never feels the need to commit one way or another....... a monster.<br />
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2. Always put a voice to your feelings. Express feelings of insecurity, doubt, confusion just like you express feelings of love, concern, or satisfaction. You have to air those feelings out. If you don't, there's a good chance the object of those feelings won't know you feel that way. And if they don"t know you feel that way, then they don't know there are things that need to change in order for you to be happy. The last thing you wanna do is create a false sense of security. You'll end up stuck with a selfish person that can't take criticism...a monster.<br />
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3. If you create a monster, know that it WILL, eventually, kill you. It's a monster, after all. And that's what monsters do. As hurtful and crushing as that is to hear....it's the truth. And when it happens, you can't even be mad, because the reality is that you created it. And we KNOW when we've created a monster. Don't be in denial. Let it go before it kills you.<br />
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4. Never build your 'Happily Ever After' around a person. I know that sounds like common knowledge, but it's easy to do when you've been with a person for years upon years. People are not possessions. At any given moment, someone can decide to not be a part of your life anymore and there's nothing you can do about it. Build your happy ending around the promises of God. He KNOWS the plans he has for your life. He's not still trying to figure it out. And the best part of the whole thing is this: He has never, ever failed. He gets it right every time.<br />
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Some lessons are hard to learn. I can, honestly, say that these have been the hardest. But I learned them, and that's the important thing. I know I've been MIA for a while, but life has been kinda hard on the emotional side lately. Sometimes I have to take a step back and regroup. I took a hard a punch in September, another one in October, and then another one last month. It's enough to knock anyone off their block for minute. I'm back though! And I'm excited about new things happening for me, as a writer, this year. Details will be coming very soon!!! Thank you all for being patient with me. LET'S GET IT!!! :)Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-7692514972270199222010-11-20T10:23:00.000-08:002010-11-20T10:28:52.170-08:00Pep Talk for my People (...currently in a Quarter-Life Crisis)<div style="text-align: center;"><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGmk2bqA4BMUM3DLeQ5apbdCrsHSc74pC5EX6VF_thh62RMrF3Yvpst9p00Yr-OKZHNSdRV-zBr9eAh1yyk7XZAKBr7HBO34Kf0P8WImnMQO_gyPmVH6hbvjesksdTvti9a2q4jTisWJw/s320/Foggy_Path_by_Dalberti.jpg" /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div>Lately, I've been in this thing they call a 'Quarter Life-Crisis'. (Don't know what a Quarter-Life Crisis is? Click <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quarter-life_crisis">HERE</a>.) Actually, it's been longer than lately.... it's been about a year now. One year ago, almost to the day, I started to realize that I was very close to all my dreams never coming true. I realized that I had, basically, made a mess of my life.... that I was unsatisfied in almost every area. Don't get me wrong, I was, generally, a happy person. I had everything I needed, but I wanted so much more. I don't think I knew, specifically, what I wanted more of at that point. And to a certain extent it's still hard to name. I just like to call it 'space', now.... an 'enlarged territory', if you will. <br />
(Do you have the sudden urge to listen to Donald Lawrence's "Bless Me (Prayer of Jabez) right now? I thought u might. Click <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bp5smhDBGH4">HERE</a>. You can thank me later.)<br />
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Anyway, the more I talked to my friends and associates in my age group, the more I started seeing that yall are, basically, feeling the same way. I've heard all of yall express the same, general dissatisfaction with the status quo of your lives. I've heard all of yall express a sense of urgency in changing things in your lives now in order to reach that point where dreams meet destiny faster. I want to put that out there because one of the most frustrating aspects of this 'place' we're in is the feeling of isolation...that feeling that no one really understands. The truth is quite the contrary. We ALL understand. I have the most diverse circle out here.... rappers, singers, producers, writers, event planners, doctors, nurses, professors, ministers, accountants, entrepreneurs, lawyers, chef's.... we got it all, yall. Look around you. <br />
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Some of yall do a few of these things, with yall's bad selves! Stick with it! I know it's not bringing in the money yet, but hang in there. No matter how many times you fall, always find the courage to get back up. Continue to walk by faith. Know that there is a plan. <br />
To those of you that haven't tapped into your dreams yet....Be encouraged. Just because you don't know what the plan is, doesn't mean there isn't one. God has a plan and a purpose for all of us. He has not forgotten you. <br />
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<div style="text-align: center;"><em>"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, said the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end." ~Jeremiah 29:11</em></div><div style="text-align: left;"></div><div style="text-align: left;">Take faith in the fact that the Lord himself has an 'expected end' for you. We need to all make sure that we are lining up with his plan and not wasting time trying to come up with our own. There IS no other way. Think of it as a GPS system. The destination has been established. The first route he gives you is always the least complicated. Every time you go off course, he's forced to reroute you.... that's when things start to get complicated and time consuming. I'm telling you. I have tried (to make it. I couldn't take it. I. had. to. face. it. That there is no other way.... HAHA) to make God work my plan. He just doesn't operate that way. I've wasted time, energy, and youth trying to do it my way. It just doesn't work. I'm enforcing that and reinforcing that, because some of yall really think you can be successful without total submission to the will of God. I love you all. That's why I need to flat out let you know that it's not going to happen. Only God can give increase.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><em>"So then neither is he that plants any thing, neither he that waters; but God that gives the increase."~1 Corinthians 3:7</em></div><div style="text-align: left;"></div><div style="text-align: left;">Anyway, I just wanted to take a minute to encourage the people I love. I know it's hard and the path is unclear, but just keep walking and trust that the path is still there and that God is still faithful to keep you on it. That's what they call 'walking by faith'. You are not alone. God cares and so do I. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">That's my word... and I'm out. Be blessed :)</div>Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-64166101679403769832010-11-19T15:18:00.000-08:002010-11-19T15:21:56.025-08:00The COTLG Total Worship Experience!!!<div style="text-align: center;"><img alt="The Church of the Living God : COTLG Total Worship Experience" class="album-cover" id="ctl00_leftColumn_imgAlbumCover" src="http://images.cdbaby.name/t/c/tcotlg.jpg" style="border-bottom-width: 0px; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-width: 0px; height: 195px; width: 195px;" /></div><br />
COTLG Total Worship Experience<br />
<br />
<br />
The Church of the Living God <br />
© Copyright-The Church of The Living God <br />
Record Label: The Church of The Living God<br />
<br />
So....it's only by sheer accident that I have not promoted this CD on this blog before now. Look. Peep game. This is a great gospel CD!! And I'm not just saying that because it's the church I attend or because I'm on it (background). If you want a good praise and worship CD that will bless your mind, heart, and spirit....this is IT! There's something on here for everybody!!! They make great stocking stuffers and can serve as a reminder that Jesus is, in fact, the reason for the season. If you don't have your copy yet....order it now from CD Baby! <br />
<br />
Here's the link<br />
<a href="http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/tcotlg">http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/tcotlg</a><br />
<br />
GO! Listen to the snippets! Order it TODAY! Do it NOW!<br />
<br />
or...if you know me, personally, hit me up and I can get u a copy. Either way... Do it NOW!Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-91792702891809037722010-11-15T21:03:00.000-08:002010-11-15T21:03:34.379-08:00Randomness (....at best).<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5ZR4ng7QKJAYOvhI5zyeKQwEl_msAAdJsgl0fjJnn4noTrY1lgXtPCQoAiLKCTveEQ21h77LjmFIpZX5QSSCET782667YofloWDCGmwn9zG0In4yXCRtSe2SRhtrasj_YQUsN5PfWRwR8/s1600/CompleteandUtterRandomnessSign.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="265" px="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5ZR4ng7QKJAYOvhI5zyeKQwEl_msAAdJsgl0fjJnn4noTrY1lgXtPCQoAiLKCTveEQ21h77LjmFIpZX5QSSCET782667YofloWDCGmwn9zG0In4yXCRtSe2SRhtrasj_YQUsN5PfWRwR8/s320/CompleteandUtterRandomnessSign.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><em>WARNING: There is absolutely no point to this blog post. It was created for the sole purpose of clearing some mental space. Don't try to make it make sense. That would be a waste of your life. Read at your own risk. </em></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div>1. What is the point of asking a question you really don't want to know the answer to? We've all done it at one time or another. You really don't want to know the truth, but you feel like it's the right question to ask in that moment so you ask it anyway. The problem is... what do you do with the information once you have it? I think that's a question I need to start asking myself before I ask questions... What will I do with the information once I have it? I think it would save me a lot of mental energy. Real talk. And speaking of 'mental energy'....<br />
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2. Every once in a while, people say things that hurt our feelings. Sometimes it's intentional. Sometimes it's by pure accident. Sometimes it's someone we don't know. Sometimes it's a close friend. The point is...it happens. It happens to me quite frequently (but that's another day's post). I used to waste a lot of mental energy being pissed off at the person(s) that hurt my feelings....and when I say a lot of mental energy, I mean a LOT of mental energy. Imagine being so mad at someone that you can't even stand looking at them. Imagine that the very idea of them entering the room makes you want to leave the room. I've been there. Until, one day, it occurred to me that my hurt feelings were never going to heal, because my own insecurities were continuing to open the wounds. It occurred to me that my feelings are only ever hurt when my insecurities are exposed. So, the way to get beyond the hurt feelings is to deal with my own personal insecurities. I'm not excusing people that say or do hurtful things. I'm saying that when it happens, the best thing to do is to figure out why it hurts so much, and then work on that. That way, even if the person never apologizes, you don't continue to stay broken. I think they call that 'building a bridge'. And since we're talking about bridges...<br />
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3. I'm about ready to start burning some....bridges, that is. People always say 'burning bridges' in a negative kind of way. Let me tell you something.... some bridges need to be burned to an asphalt crisp. Do you HEAR me?! We can't be friends, associates... I don't even want to be strangers with you. If it were possible, I'd relocate to an entirely different universe just so I wouldn't have to take a chance on running into you. That's heavy, I know. But I feel THAT strongly about it. So ummmmm.......yeah. Moving right along....as we sometimes do...<br />
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4. I don't like being around people that don't make me laugh. Seriously. And speaking of laughter....<br />
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5. People. People. People.... learn to laugh, please. I have a weird sense of humor. Always have. I would say that I'm one of those people that laughs to keep from crying, but that's not really accurate. I cry when I feel like crying, it's just that I feel like laughing way more often. I don't know if it's a good or bad thing, but I've come to appreciate the fact that I can find something funny about even the worst situations. It's not that I mean to trivialize or make light of anything traumatic...not at all. I just mean that, no matter what its happening around me, somehow, I always manage to laugh hysterically at something...at some point. I really think it's a gift from God....the ability to laugh, even in the midst of adversity. Everybody can't do that. Have you ever been talking to someone who's going through something and you make a funny (a REAL funny...not one of those 'I don't know what to say so I'll just make a joke' funnies) and they don't laugh even though you know that any other time they would? It's rough. I'm one of those people that ends the conversation shortly after that. I know that's bad, but that's real. I can't take it. No matter what you're going through, until the good Lord calls you home, life goes right on. I don't mean to be harsh, but it's the truth. It's ok to be sad, mad, angry...whatever. But don't lose your sense of humor. It's way too valuable.<br />
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I think I'm done....for now, that is. Thanks for indulging in my randomness.Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-36577979062929634442010-11-11T14:05:00.000-08:002010-11-11T14:05:41.425-08:00Nothing Even Matters....'These buildings could drift out to sea... some natural catastrophe. Still, there's no place I'd rather be. Cuz nothing even matters to me.".....<br />
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<object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/LXm9QpFzuMk?fs=1&hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/LXm9QpFzuMk?fs=1&hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-91680907859809351952010-11-10T13:53:00.001-08:002010-11-10T13:53:53.658-08:00He Saw the Best....<object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/vgwt-UhPhhs?fs=1&hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/vgwt-UhPhhs?fs=1&hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-43889249832333692792010-11-10T11:08:00.000-08:002010-11-10T11:08:30.345-08:00My Thoughts on "Atheist Ministers Struggling With Leading the Faithful"Here's the link again.... in case you didn't read my post from last night and are too lazy (haha) to go back:<br />
<a href="http://abcnews.go.com/WN/atheist-ministers-leading-faithful/story?id=12004359&page=1">http://abcnews.go.com/WN/atheist-ministers-leading-faithful/story?id=12004359&page=1</a><br />
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I guess my first question is: Can one be 'talked out' of their faith? I do not, personally, believe one can. UNLESS one freely opens their mind to allow such. Even then, my feeling is that one must have a reason for doing so. This is part of the issue I have with the story as a whole. It feels like there are pieces missing to me....important pieces. I googled the phrase 'unbelieving clergy' which is the title of the study done at Tufts that ABC used as a basis for the story. I was unable to find a complete study, just reports that the study is being done. I take this to mean it's not yet completed. I could be wrong. Don't worry, though, I'll find out...if I have to contact Tufts directly. I'm just curious to see the whole thing. But I digress.... Where was I going with this?.... OH YEAH..... pieces missing. My thought is that a person can not be 'talked out' of their faith without already having some doubt or already have some subconscious welcoming to allow it. Let me just make it plain. No one can talk you out of believing in God unless you, in your heart, have already started entertaining the idea that he may not exist. This does not just happen. There had to have been some event that triggered it. You don't just wake up one day and question whether or not God exists after you have believed he does your whole life. Something had to happen. I'm not saying that it makes you a bad person. I'm just saying that my belief is that a loss of faith in God is triggered by a misinterpretation of a trying event(s) in life. <br />
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I find, particularly interesting, the minister that explored atheist views so that he could 'defend' his faith. Here's my problem, no place in the Bible does God command us do defend our faith. As a minister, your job is to serve the people of God and to deliver the word of God...as it is. The Bible says...<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;"><em>"10 As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, </em></div><div style="text-align: center;"><em>11 so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." </em></div><div style="text-align: center;"><em>~Isaiah 55:10-11</em></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Your job is to give the word, not defend it. When you give it, it's going to accomplish the purpose it was meant to accomplish. That's it and that's all. For him to say "My thinking was that God is big enough to handle any questions that I can come up with,"... My thinking is this... Yes, God is big enough to handle any questions you may have but you have to direct those questions to the right place if you want the right answer. Why would you seek the thoughts of an atheist concerning the questions you have about God and expect to walk away with answers that strengthen your faith? That makes no sense. UNLESS, your intent was not really to have your faith strengthened... in which case, it makes perfect sense.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Another part I find, particularly, interesting is the minister that said... "The more I read the Bible, the more questions I had,.....The more things didn't make sense to me -- what it said -- and the more things didn't add up." He went on to say "Reading the Bible is what led me not to believe in God." He went on to question some of the miracles of God. My question is... Why are you trying to make God make sense or 'add up'? He is GOD! The word says that he is able to do immeasurably more than we can even ask or THINK. (Ephesians 3:20) Do you know what that means? You can not even begin to imagine what God is capable of. The fact that you can't make it make sense only makes him MORE awesome, not less....UNLESS, your intention is to discredit that which you can not explain.... In which case, you walking away with disbelief makes perfect sense. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">*shrugs*</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">My next question is: Is it morally, spiritually, ethically right to continue in ministry if you no longer believe in God, just because it's your only means of supporting your family? When I googled 'unblieving clergy', I came across a quote by a guy named Richard Land. He said...</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><em>"It's not important that they believe what you believe. But it IS important that they believe that you believe it."</em></div><div style="text-align: center;"><em>~Richard Land</em></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Now let me say this... I don't agree with a lot of the stuff this dude had to say on the topic, but I think he makes a good point here. I, personally, need to believe that my pastor believes what he speaks to me concerning the word and will of God. We all get weak in our faith sometimes. It's in those times that I pull on the faith of others until mine is back where it needs to be. A lot of times, I pull off of the faith of my Pastor during those times. I'm not saying that he is not human and capable of being weak in faith at times, as well. I'm just saying that when I want to believe but am having a hard time believing, I depend on him (and others) to believe it for me. I, personally, believe that's part of the reason God gives us leaders and brothers/sisters in faith.... to be strong in faith for us when we are weak. To continue to depend on the people of a God you don't believe in to support your family is, ethically, wrong...in my humble opinion. I can't really say on a spiritual tip, because I don't really KNOW their hearts. That's the Lord's call. Notice, though, how God has continued to be faithful to them, even though they have become completely faithless. Look how God continues to take care of them and their families even though they don't even believe he exists anymore. The grace of God... He is SO good. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Anyway, that's my word. I'm out. Be blessed :) </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
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</div><div align="left" style="text-align: left;"></div>Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-76291829600006739582010-11-09T17:18:00.000-08:002010-11-09T17:22:04.673-08:00Athiest Ministers Leading the FaithfulI saw this story on the news tonight. It's about Ministers/Pastors that no longer believe in God but are still leading ministries. I thought it was SUPER interesting to say the least. <br />
<br />
Here's the actual link. <br />
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<a href="http://abcnews.go.com/WN/atheist-ministers-leading-faithful/story?id=12004359">http://abcnews.go.com/WN/atheist-ministers-leading-faithful/story?id=12004359</a><br />
<br />
Check it out<a href="http://abcnews.go.com/WN/atheist-ministers-leading-faithful/story?id=12004359"> </a>and tell me what you think. Do yall think this is right? Can a Pastor lead a congregation in a faith he/she no longer holds? Do you have to believe it to preach it? <br />
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I'm gonna post my personal response to it tomorrow. I have SOOOOO much to say about it. I just don't even have the energy tonight. LoLMikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-29584248894215987842010-11-09T07:34:00.000-08:002010-11-09T07:34:27.028-08:00God Made Me Who I AmI need this today.<br />
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Be blessed :)Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-68459619616854468642010-11-05T07:32:00.000-07:002010-11-05T07:32:06.111-07:00Heaven, I Need a Hug<img src="http://www.bellagab.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/Grieving-Heart.jpg" /><br />
It has been almost two months since my Grandma passed away. I still have trouble saying she 'died', because she's still very much alive in my heart. I know that sounds cliche'...and we all know how much I hate cliche's...but that's the truth. I don't know if she'll ever 'die' to me. So much of who I am came from who she is....and I say 'is' instead of 'was' because we can all still feel her character, personality, and style around us everyday. <br />
<br />
My Grandma played a huge part in raising me. My other Grandparents passed on when I was much younger. So, for, roughly, 15 years, she was my only grandparent. They were tight shoes to wear, but she always made it look so easy. She did it so well, in fact, that I hardly even noticed that I only had one grandparent. She came to EVERY school Grandparent's Day with me. She cooked for me. She gave me unreasonably high amounts of money to do minuscule chores. She rewarded me for good grades. She took up for me when my Momz wanted to kill me. She taught me how to iron a blouse. She even taught me how to drive and then bought my first car, paid for my first cell phone, and took me on more trips than I can even remember. I could go on for hours and these are just things she did for me when I was still a kid. <br />
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It wasn't until I went off to school that I learned her in a different capacity. Besides all the material and monetary things she did for me (I can't even begin to name them all), I learned who my Grandma was...just as a person. That was when I found out that there was nothing you could say to her that would catch her off guard or make her look at you differently. She was the least judgemental person I have ever met. I can say that with confidence. It didn't matter what you did, she still loved you. She still cared about you. She still wanted to help you. I can't tell you how many times I called her and said 'Grandma, I got a problem.' and without hesitation, she always said 'What's up?' And she never seemed surprised by anything that followed. She was just cool like that. Sometimes, she would even call me before I even got around to calling her. It was almost like she had some kind of connection to me...like she just KNEW something was wrong. The morning after My HEA and I broke up after 5.5 years, she called...first thing in the morning. And she just said 'You were on my mind when I woke up, is everything ok?' I was so fragile at that moment that the very sound of her voice triggered a break down. I struggled, through the crying to tell her what was happening. I remember her exact words... 'Baby, I am SO sorry. I know you're hurting right now. But I promise it won't hurt forever. You just keep on living. Go ahead and cry today, but tomorrow, put one foot in front of the other and keep moving. That's not to say it won't hurt tomorrow too. It's gonna hurt for while. But you still gotta keep going. You still gotta keep living.' <br />
<br />
On nights like last night (when I can't sleep) and days like today (when I can't stop the tears), I remember those words. Words can not even express the heaviness of my heart since she has been gone. I have been, literally, sick over it. But I remember those words and put one foot in front of the other every day. As hard as it is to keep going, to keep living, to keep laughing, to keep enjoying life... I do, because I know that's what she wants me to do. Someone, recently, told me that I make it look easy. I wanted to break down in tears right there. It's not easy at all. It's not me making it look easy, it's the Lord. I know it's him, and only him, that's keeping me right now. I manage to hold it together when people are around, but in the quiet hours, when it's just me and the Lord, I struggle. God is so faithful though. He is always here. He is always with me. So, I know I'll be ok. But today is one of those days.... I could really use a hug.<br />
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That's my word. And I'm out. Be blessed.Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-26554015954269856062010-10-18T13:15:00.000-07:002010-10-18T13:15:37.383-07:00'Don't Ask. Don't Tell': Why I Don't Believe in Exclusive Dating.I had a conversation with a friend of mine who is in a fresh relationship yesterday. She was thinking of having lunch with an old friend of the opposite sex and was torn ab whether or not she should tell her boyfriend ab the lunch. The whole situation reminded me about why I don't believe in exclusive dating in the first place. My position was 'Don't Ask. Don't Tell'. Which is my position on relationships, in general. <br />
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I guess I should, first, warn you that this post is gonna piss some people off. My motivation, though, is the other 25% or yall that are gonna feel where I'm coming from and identify with where I'm at. I'm taking this one for the team. There are not a lot of us out here... Black women that reject the idea of exclusion before marriage. I'm not speaking about an entirely 'Open Relationship'. What I'm talking about here is more of a 'Don't Ask. Don't Tell.' type of situation. Maybe I should start there.<br />
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An open relationship is a relationship in which, within mutually agreed limits, the participants are free to have emotional and/or physical relationships with others. What I'm talking about here lies in the 'within mutually agreed limits' part of the definition. 'Don't ask. Don't tell.'(or DADT). The mutually agreed upon limits of a DADT might look a little something like this:<br />
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*There is a mutual understanding that, for all practical purposes, this is your significant other. What this means is, the two of you do not, openly, date others. The important people in your life know this person to be your boyfriend/girlfriend/dude/lady/whatever you want to call it. You receive all rights and privileges that come with such a position. However...<br />
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*The two of you are allowed to see other people. If you so choose to. This makes better since if I say it like this...The two of you are not prohibited from seeing other people. AS LONG AS, the people you are seeing have been made aware that there is someone, who takes precedence over them, in the picture AND that person respects the boundaries of the situation. (ie.not calling at disrespectful hours, starting arguments, drawing attention to self, ect.) I know it's confusing, but stay with me because this is where it gets a little tricky...<br />
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*As long as there has not been a breech of boundaries on the part of the side chick/dude in some form, the two of you do not inquire about whether or not either of you see someone(s) on the side AND as long as there is not a necessity to do so, you do not voluntarily tell each other about the person(s) you see on the side. However, if asked... and the situation at hand warrants an inquiry, the two of you are forthcoming with the requested information.<br />
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(I, purposely, left out any sexual stipulations. I'm encouraging abstinence, not promiscuity, not even exclusion. Abstinence.)<br />
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Now... I already know what some of yall are thinking. 'AH AINT BOUT TUH GIVE MAH DUDE PERMISSION TO KICK IT WIT NOBODY ELSE!!' I'm gonna challenge you to come out of that 2x2x2 box for just a minute. Go ahead. Crawl on out. I'll wait.<br />
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Here's what I DO know. Titles are pointless. They don't stop a person from cheating. Take it from a from a person that has been on both ends of the deal. It doesn't stop a person from stepping outside of boundaries attempted to be set by it. I know this is hard for some of yall to grasp because I know some of yall live for the title. But keep it real... Did the fact that *insert cheating ex's name here* was your 'boyfriend' stop him from getting it in with *insert slore's name here* every chance he got? No. Why? Titles are not what keeps a person faithful. If a person wants to cheat on you, there is nothing you can do to stop them. The key to a person remaining faithful, is their own disinterest in seeing other people. That comes from commitment and connection.<br />
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Commitment- not to a title, but to a person. This is why I have such problems with titles. Most people use them as a way to control the people they love. 'If this person is my boyfriend, then he should act like this'. or 'If this person is my best friend, they should do this.' We start expecting people to conform to the titles we put on them as opposed to waiting for them to reveal (by their own actions) what their commitment level to the relationship we have really is. A person's commitment level is not determined by titles, but connection.<br />
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Notice I said 'connection' and not 'love'. Commitment is not always attached to love. Sometimes it is. A lot of times it's not. I know all too well that you can love somebody and lose your connection to them. When the connection is lost, so is the commitment. You don't have to believe me, but I'm telling you what I know. This is why we love some people enough to let them go. The fact that I love you, does not mean that I have to stay committed to you even after my connection to you has been lost. (If that were the case, some of us would be in some bad situations right now. So, thank God, it's not.) A person does not commit to that which they feel no connection to. And when two people feel a strong connection to each other, they, on they're own free will, cease having outside relationships. Because they have no desire to. Voluntary commitment...(meaning... I'm committed to you because I want to be) is a helluva lot stronger and more powerful than forced commitment (meaning... I'm committed to you because I feel like I have to be.) <br />
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Once two people have reached a point where they are voluntarily faithful to each other... where the connection between the two of them is so strong that they are ready to commit only to each other... That's when you know you're ready to take the vows. This is why the only titled relationship I choose to be in is marriage. It's the only title that really matters. It's the only title that comes with an obligation to 'forsake all others'. It's the only title the Bible acknowledges. We all know that some people cheat in marriages. These people probably cheated in exclusive relationships too. My point is... concentrate on the connection and not the title. If the connection is right, the commitment will be there, and your position will remain intact.<br />
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That's my take. Discuss.Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-62204671821925625482010-10-11T22:54:00.000-07:002010-10-11T22:54:19.742-07:00Single is not AvailableA person's relationship status is not an indication of their availability. <br />
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I wish it was. But it's not. That's why you have to learn to ask the right questions. Stop asking people if they are single and start asking if they're available.<br />
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That's all I really have to say about that...for now.<br />
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I'm out.Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-61313182849570829922010-10-06T09:17:00.000-07:002010-10-06T09:17:40.815-07:00J. Moss- RestoredThis song has been in my spirit for days now. Just thought I'd share. Be blessed. <br />
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<object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/HuPuBEy1GUs?fs=1&hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/HuPuBEy1GUs?fs=1&hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-9562632218490063432010-10-06T09:08:00.000-07:002010-10-06T09:08:25.487-07:00We live in two different worlds......What's it like to be YOU?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlN4zS-dWslYJAlBq_Bp8eRwPgsMdcXsuUaPvQa4GSJjbgapD_P_3-JsOwf1iw3LBpavf4pV0GQ7mgKf7CfTTU5Hd8Af_cI5MqwwBm4FCOs3iGVjF_l7ARo0YVrG_Lo1LLk9Q2ap7uUV70/s1600/venusandearth.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlN4zS-dWslYJAlBq_Bp8eRwPgsMdcXsuUaPvQa4GSJjbgapD_P_3-JsOwf1iw3LBpavf4pV0GQ7mgKf7CfTTU5Hd8Af_cI5MqwwBm4FCOs3iGVjF_l7ARo0YVrG_Lo1LLk9Q2ap7uUV70/s1600/venusandearth.jpg" /></a></div><br />
Have you ever talked to a friend about your issues of life and when they start talking back to you, you realize that they really don't understand your life? That happened to me yesterday. It kind of messed me up a little because it was someone I consider a good friend.... Someone whose opinion I seek on a regular basis... Someone I love, respect, and admire. I've done my best to be transparent with this person. Well, as transparent as I can be for the time we've known each other. And yet, she opened her mouth, began to speak, and it was like... she was talking to a complete stranger. She THOUGHT she was talking to me, but what she was saying was not resonating with my spirit at all because it felt rehearsed... cliche... Hallmark, even. My first emotion was frustration, because I felt like she hadn't really heard what I said before she gave me such a programmed response. It felt judgmental in that moment. The more I thought about it, though, I realized that she and I live in two very different worlds. And the truth is... She has no idea what it's like to be me. <br />
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I say all the time that people are a product of their experiences. The way we see the world is directly affected by the way the world has impacted us. In like manner, the impact we choose to have on the world is directly related to the way we see the world around us. What does that mean? It means that no two people, metaphorically speaking, live in the same world. So, the way I see a situation could be largely different than the way someone else does. As was the case here. My friend (lets call her Dawn) came from a place in her own world... a world that is, might I add, particularly black and white, for whatever reason. There's nothing wrong with her world being black and white if she likes it that way. BUT, my world happens to be particularly gray, for lots of reasons, in the area we were speaking about. She didn't take that into consideration before responding to what I had said. She probably has no idea that our worlds are so different. How would she know when I work so hard to keep it a secret?<br />
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I realized that not only does she have no idea what it's like to be me every day, I have no idea what her world is really like either. I know one side of it... what makes her laugh, what she loves to do, who she loves to be around. But I don't know her struggles, her issues, her fears, her regrets.... all the things we DON'T say and yet, carry around with us on a regular basis. Why are we so afraid of transparency? Why are we so afraid of giving each other a full view of the worlds we, individually, live in?<br />
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We need to understand that everybody is coming from someplace different. Dawn wasn't trying to be judgmental, but she spoke on my situation without understanding the world I live in. That doesn't make her a bad person. I still love, admire, and respect her with my whole heart. But it made me realize that I need to take a step back and really pay attention to the world SHE lives in so that I can make her understand the world I live in.<br />
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That's my word... And I'm out.Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8059770472130793082.post-738474648199294462010-09-22T10:32:00.000-07:002010-09-22T10:32:07.974-07:00Emotional Retardation... It's very real.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsWGfWbOX_4wCgtMoE4QTuGkR61dBh-8YOLP0BxQyETnWsMK6Sa-8DlyQVzDt5O_H7dlWv0yON5vtnkpedb4H6SYXhG3jsuXYKSgXHLI2O-bzqJHTNi77xlK76DCoOT78XTPUT7sTDQAGm/s1600/handicapped.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsWGfWbOX_4wCgtMoE4QTuGkR61dBh-8YOLP0BxQyETnWsMK6Sa-8DlyQVzDt5O_H7dlWv0yON5vtnkpedb4H6SYXhG3jsuXYKSgXHLI2O-bzqJHTNi77xlK76DCoOT78XTPUT7sTDQAGm/s320/handicapped.jpg" /></a></div><br />
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Before I get started with this post, I just want to say that I work with Developmentally Disabled kids. I am in no way making fun of anyone developmentally disabled. In fact, this post has nothing to do with any physical or cognitive conditions. However, if you are sensitive to the subject and are easily offended... you may want to sit this one out.<br />
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Now that that's out of the way. Today, boyz and girlz, I would like to discuss with you a phenomenon I like to call 'Emotional Retardation". For the purposes of this post, I'm going to define Emotional Retardation (ER) as significantly impaired emotional functioning. Still don't know what I mean? Don't worry. You will once this post is over. We have all been affected, in some way or another, either by a someones inability to constructively express emotions or their inability to feel emotions, period. (if you haven't, then you're probably the ER one in your circle). That's what I'm talking about here.... the people in your life that didn't get enough hugs or affection as a child and are now adults that have no idea how to deal with emotions.<br />
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Just like mental retardation, there are different levels or 'classes' of ER: Mild, Moderate, Severe, and Profound. Let's discuss...<br />
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A person of Mild Emotional Retardation is hard to identify. They seem to be very normal when you meet them. In fact, it's likely that the only people that realize they have a problem are their significant other or their best friend. These are, generally, very level headed people. That is, until they experience some type of hurt. Then, they viciously attack the people closest to them... ALWAYS and ONLY the people closest to them. This class of ER is more commonly seen in women. Take, for example, Ashley (all names have been changed to protect the handicapped). Ashley's 1st cousin, recently, died unexpectedly. (Sad... I know) Her best friend, Courtney, has been by Ashley's side through the whole process. One day, Courtney jokes with Ashley (as she always has) about Ashley's inability to work her high tech cell phone and... BOOM... like a time bomb, Ashley flips out telling Courtney that she should worry more about her failing relationship instead of Ashley's phone. Low blow, right? Yes. Is her issue really with Courtney? Of course not. But that's what these people do. That's what makes them so dangerous. You never see it coming and then.... POW!<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAfz4mq0Oixj3iSzXByJXyX6hi6JGA45zleVUNtFpC0WuXNRhjXDYD_pWdwFNgzitnrn9XLcNuF-2p7oU4Ra6E0IwWMYviFMF5jyuPjBDBUK42PGI9ULkktv4FdeuvynsQsS7nMGjXph4v/s1600/lowblow.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAfz4mq0Oixj3iSzXByJXyX6hi6JGA45zleVUNtFpC0WuXNRhjXDYD_pWdwFNgzitnrn9XLcNuF-2p7oU4Ra6E0IwWMYviFMF5jyuPjBDBUK42PGI9ULkktv4FdeuvynsQsS7nMGjXph4v/s320/lowblow.jpg" /></a></div><br />
Just like that, the damage is done.<br />
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The next level of ER is Moderate. These are the people that have no problem expressing negative emotions, like: anger, sadness, or frustration. However, the moment you tell them you love them, they freeze up on you like satellite tv in a tornado. I feel especially bad for these people. They normally know they have a problem, but they have no idea what to do about it. These people can rarely compliment people either. They normally can't say anything nice or heartfelt to someone without some kind of comic relief. In friendships, they tend to hurt their friends feelings by making jokes about their appearance when what they really mean to say is "You look nice today. I like your outfit." I know. It's confusing. In romantic relationships, their significant other says "I love you" and they joke it off saying something like 'Whatever' or 'That's so lame' when what they really want to say is 'I love you too. You're special to me.' You can identify these people by their inability to share a genuine emotional moment with ANYONE...EVER. These people are this way, more than likely, because they came from families that never express positive emotions. Most of the people closest to them accept it as such and move on.<br />
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People with Severe ER, are very special individuals. These are the people in your life that feel lots of emotions at once, but have no idea how to express them. This is more commonly seen among men. They show their love for you by what they do for you. They think you should know they love you because they wash your car or take you out all the time. They get really frustrated in relationships when their significant other says "I don't know how you feel about me" or "I don't know if you love me or not". These type of statements piss them off GREATLY. They think you should KNOW they love you because of all the things they do to make you happy. I'm telling you.... if you think your s/o is severely ER, say something like that to them and see how fast they flip out. These people are very hard to read. If they are upset with you...they probably won't tell you. If they are happy with you.... more than likely, they won't tell you that either. The only way to really get to know people like this is time. You have to spend lots of time with them to learn to read their emotions through their actions. Their friends and s/o generally find them to be very exhausting people to deal with.<br />
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Finally, let's talk about Profoundly ER people. They do not feel emotions and therefore, can not express them. These people are basically, numb. They have found a way to block any and all emotions. When you are happy, they can not be happy with you... they don't know how. When you are sad, they can not comfort you... they can't feel compassion. These are the most difficult of all the ER folks out there to deal with. Their friends and s/o feel emotions FOR them, which makes having any type of relationship with them tedious and draining, to say the least. These people claim to be very logical people. They use that word 'logic' a lot. The truth is... they couldn't feel emotion if it weighed 60lbs and fell on top of their heads. The sad part is, these people are not normally born this way. They, normally, have had some tragic thing happen to them that caused them so much pain that they refused, from that point on, to feel any emotions at all. It's unfortunate. It's virtually impossible to be in a relationship with a person like this. They can't tell you how they feel..... they don't know and then they make you feel ridiculous for having emotions yourself. Smh. Do yourself a favor and stay away from these people.<br />
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So ummmmmmmmmm..... that's my take on Emotional Retardation. I want to know what you have to say about it. Do you know some people like this? How do you deal with them?...Mikkihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13626066034416349720noreply@blogger.com0